One Common Problem + Dogs
According to the internet, and it NEVER lies so this is a super reliable source: crediting Albert Einstein for that quote is up for debate. Did he say it? Did he not? Either way, it’s floating around and majority of users give him the credit. It’s a great quote and he was a genius so…it “fits.” Giving credit to him “makes sense.”
And that’s what us humans always try to do. Make sense of everything. “My dog jumps on me therefore he loves me.” OR “My dog jumps on me therefore he disrespects me.” Exact same scenario with two different viewpoints. The former is seeing it as an act of admiration and the latter is starting to see it as a behavioural issue.
If you are Group A, where your dog is jumping all over you when you come home, you tolerate it because he’s “hugging” you and what kind of monster would shut down his joy? You’ve made sense of his behaviour; there’s a reason for it, so it’s okay. But then there’s always a time where it’s NOT okay - you’ve walked into your house and he’s knocked your $6 coffee out of your hand and onto the floor, your friend stops by and their new sweater has a snag from a nail, and your kids are scared of the dog because they know the outcome of his excitement.
If you are Group A, you are creating confusion within your dog. Having certain rules and expectations depending on your mood is instability. But you can’t solve this problem until you see it is a problem. Until you see that invasion of space (aka when your dog jumps on you and you didn’t ask for it) is a problem; it’s not going to stop.
Why is it a problem? Simply put: It’s not fair to your dog. Even if you don’t give two shits about dog psychology and how that level of excitement would be shut down in an instant if a leader dog was present, it’s not fair to your dog to have to navigate the greetings with inconsistent leadership from a human. Sometimes the jumping up on their terms is okay and sometimes it isn’t? Super confusing.
Don’t worry - there’s a silver lining to this! Once you shift your thinking, and see that it’s disrespectful on their part to be jumping on anyone, and it’s also unfair on your part to allow it most of the time then damn them to hell other times, there is a secret to this:
Anything is okay on your terms!
You can “train” your dog to only jump on you when you ask for it; and because you asked for it, you’re in control and the dog knows what is expected out of them.
Hey Group B (those who already know it’s a problem) - I haven’t forgot about you!
“Knowing there is a problem is 90% of solving it” - Dave Ramsey’s Dad…and now Amanda…
The hard part is over for you guys, you’ve reached your limit, and are using a different way of thinking to solve your problem. You are ready for change! Keep expecting respect out of your dog, stay consistent, and be prepared with a leash when company comes over.
Both groups need to ask themselves: “Did I ask for this level of excitement?…” Every. Single. Time. If the answer is no, then correct and have the Dog Party once they’re settled and you’re the one doing the asking.
I promise your dog will still love you more than anyone else on the planet.